My classes started off pretty well.
I had Mrs. Delilah for history, the same as last year. However, I was surprised to find Juliet waving at me from the back of the class, an empty seat beside her. I guessed the teachers had finally learned their lesson and divided the Triplets into different classes; and lucky me, I was going to share each of my classes with at least one of them.
It seemed that the teachers assumed that I would have a calming influence on the Triplets. A lot they knew.
Juliet smiled when I settled into the empty seat, and immediately caught me up on all the juicy gossip that she had managed to glean from her friends. Since Mrs. Delilah was known for her one sided love affair with the whiteboard and her distaste for talking to anyone who was under twenty, Juliet could do this without much sneaking around.
I spread my gaze around the class. Actually, not even one of my fellow students had the decency to even pretend to pay attention. Even the geeks who sat in front of the class held either an e-book reader or a DS in their hands.
Juliet tapped me softly on the arm and I returned my eyes to my cousin, her blue eyes observing me sharply.
I wiped a hand over my face, just in case the candy bar I had snacked on showed at the corners of my mouth. “What?”
“Nothing happened this morning, right?” Juliet’s blue eyes softened. “I mean, we shouldn’t have left you alone for so long…”
I glanced at her and saw the worry etched clearly on her heart-shaped face. The Triplets didn’t know about my talent, but they knew something was wrong with me. They heard me scream in my sleep, saw the panic attacks in crowded places, and noticed the way I reacted when people encroached on my personal space.
They’d grown protective of me over the years. They hardly ever invited new people to the house, never left me with strangers or alone for too long, and every time I couldn’t sleep, one of them was always around to talk to me.
They knew something was up with me, but they never asked—and I wasn’t ever going to tell.
Juliet squirmed in her seat when I remained quiet. “I saw Gabe and knew he’d find you right away.” She frowned, and the expression promised hell to Gabriel if he hadn’t. “He did, right?”
I scratched my nose and nodded. “Yeah, he was with me.”
Juliet beamed. “Good. How was he? He just came back from Borneo, right?”
I nodded again and shared what Gabriel had told me. Anything to get Juliet off my back. Would I ever stop freaking every time my cousins implied that they know something was wrong with me? I didn’t think so.
Would I ever stop feeling ashamed every time they thought that they had to protect me from the big bad world?
Nope.
To think that if I thought something was wrong with me, Juliet—small and delicate looking Juliet—would ride to my rescue was enough to have me feeling disgustingly useless. And I knew if Juliet was on the move, Ophelia and Titania would never be too far behind. They had the Triplet telepathy down to a science, a skill that gotten them out of trouble so many times before.
I probably wouldn’t be too embarrassed if it was Ophelia doing the rescuing rather than Juliet or, God forbid, Titania.
Ever since they’d reached puberty, the Triplets have been hell bent on being completely different from each other. While Titania chose to paint her hair ebony, join the drama club, and write angst-ridden poetry. Juliet had decided to stay blond and win every academia award in the school simply to break the dumb-blond stereotype. Ophelia, however, had cut her waist length hair up to her neck, dyed it blazing Alias red, and joined every dojo in the neighborhood that she could ride her bike to.
Every Sunday after the family run, Tai Chi, Yoga, and sparring, Ophelia and I held our own sparring match in the house’s old garage, which we had renovated into a dojo of our own. By our count, we were even last Sunday and although it was still humiliating to have 5-foot-nothing Ophelia slam my face against the practice mat I never hesitated to crow with triumph whenever I won. Ophelia was small, sure, but she fought dirty, and I felt pride that I could kick her ass.
Juliet frowned. “I don’t think I’ll see him today. I don’t have any classes with him.”
“You can join us for lunch.”
Juliet grimaced. “And watch him stuff his face with everything I want to eat but can’t because I don’t want to grow into a blimp? I don’t think so.” She sliced a glance toward me and poked her bottom lip out. “It’s not fair how you guys can eat buckets of food and not gain an ounce.”
It was an age-old complaint of the Triplets, one that I enjoyed very much—but I mustered a sympathetic expression. “Well, at least you’ve got boobs.”
Juliet perked up before looking down at her body to admire said boobs. “They are quite nice, aren’t they?”
I stifled a smile at the way Juliet innocently patted her own boobs, drawing the attention of several boys and girls alike. “They’re definitely better than mine.”
I was used to the blasé way the Triplets invaded my privacy and personal space, so I didn’t flinch when Juliet’s big, blue eyes zoomed in on my boobs like nobody’s business. At least she didn’t reach out a hand and poke them like she would have if we were in private. “It’s not the size that matters, Leah. It’s how you flaunt it.”
I just had to laugh at Juliet’s cheerful advice. “You do know that Uncle Jim would have a cow if he heard you say that, right?”
The curve on Juliet’s lips was wicked and sly. “I’m sure Gabriel like your boobs just fine.”
I didn’t even bother to sigh; the Triplets had ragged me off and on about Gabriel on a daily basis over summer break. “I’m sure that Gabe doesn’t even notice that I have them.”
Complete lie. Before we had parted for the summer Gabriel had indicated very clearly that he had noticed that I was a girl, and therefore have boobs. As if she was reading my mind—and I wouldn’t put it beneath her—Juliet scoffed. “Please. He’s a dude. He noticed your boobs. Trust me.”
“Fine.” I agreed. “But in a strictly friendly kind of way.”
Juliet snorted a laugh. “Do me a favor and tell that to Titania so she can write rude, sarcastic poetry about how you and Gabriel are ‘just friends’.”
“We are friends.”
Another lie. Wow, I was really racking them up. At least this time it was partially true.
“Uh-hm. And we didn’t actually see you guys kiss right before he left for Borneo?”
If I had been drinking something, Juliet would be dripping with it. Since I wasn’t, I merely gaped at her. “Wha-what?”
Juliet’s grin was wide and smug. “We heard him knock on your window at three o’clock in the morning. If you guys wanted to keep it a secret, he shouldn’t have been so loud.”
“He had to go real early so he figured it’d be his only chance to—”
“—kiss you goodbye?” Juliet’s grin became even wider.
“We weren’t—” All right, there was no way to get around this but to admit the truth and downplay it. “It was just an experiment.”
This time Juliet chortled gleefully. “Of what? How fast you could get each other hot? Cause, I’ll tell you, just watching you guys kiss steamed up my window pretty quick.”
I felt the hot flush rising up my cheeks and I flicked a pencil over at Juliet, which she easily caught. Damn her and her stupid cheerleader reflexes. “Keep your voice down.” I narrowed my black eyes. “You guys didn’t tell anybody about this, right?”
She flicked the pencil back, which I ignored. It landed and rolled on top of my desk. “If you don’t want anyone to gossip about you, you should’ve told him to come inside your room.” She flashed me a smile. “I bet that would’ve added a little more spice to the rumor mill.”
“I told you, it was just an experiment. I asked him to kiss me.” I rubbed my nose. It didn’t feel like it was growing longer.
Juliet looked skeptical. “Why?”
I shrugged, then rolled my eyes. “It’s not like I have a lot of guys lining up to date me. I got curious, so…” I let her fill in the blanks.
“And he just said okay?”
“Why not? It’s only a kiss.” I ducked down and pretended to search for something inside my bag. I wasn’t sure my nonchalant expression could hold up against the intensity of Juliet’s blue eyes.
When Juliet didn’t continue with her sets of questions, I figured she had accepted my explanation—I was sure Juliet had heard crazier things than best friends kissing each other—but no, when I finally lifted my head, Juliet’s eyes immediately latched back onto mine. Her expression was strangely understanding. “If you say so.”
“I do.”
I remembered the day we were talking about like it was yesterday instead of months ago. I remembered feeling disgruntled and majorly peeved that I had to get out of my warm bed. I remembered scowling at his grinning face, and I remembered, most of all, the overwhelming panic I felt over him leaving.
Needless to say, I had abandonment issues.
“Nice bed hair. Trying out a new style?” was the first thing he’d said when I slid the window open. His pale green eyes were way too clear and bright for the ungodly hour. I was tempted to throw something at him.
“Bite me. What are you doing here?” I pushed the curtains back and opened the window wider, shivering in my pajamas when a cold gust of wind blew in. “Come in, it’s too cold outside.”
He lifted an eyebrow. “You’re not going to make a habit of inviting boys into your room while I’m away, right?”
His mouth curved when I narrowed my eyes. He always did have a perverse sense of humor.
He shuffled his feet and shoved his hands into his pockets, his shoulder hunched against the cold air of early morning. “We’re going to leave early so I might not see you. I figured I’d just say goodbye now.”
I blinked and combed my fingers through my hair, fighting not to make a fist and pull. He must’ve seen something on my face, though, because he took his hands out of his pockets and reached for mine, untangling them from my hair. “I’ll be back when school starts.” His eyes searched mine and he tried out a comforting smile, as if he knew what his absence meant to me. Maybe he did. “I’ll email you when I get there.”
I kept my hands lax in his, even when he tangled our fingers together. I hated feeling needy, hated the fact that every time he left with his travel-loving parents to some obscure corner of the world, I couldn’t stomach going out of my house because I was too afraid. So I kept my fingers relaxed in his, kept my stance comfortable, although my toes curled into the fluffy rug that was spread across my bedroom floor as my mind screamed, Don’t leave. Don’t leave me.
“All right. Safe journey and don’t enjoy yourself too much. We all know what’ll happen when you do.” I maintained an easy expression on my face. It was getting easier, acting like I was okay and wrapping my tongue around a lie.
But Gabriel was Gabriel, and like the Triplets, he might not know all that was going on with me but he could sniff out my emotions like a bloodhound.
“Listen,” he said and squeezed my fingers, his almond shaped eyes—a mark of his Asian genes—met mine. “I want to try something.”
Curiosity swam clear of my panic and sense of loss. “What?”
He hesitated, looked away, and then looked back at me. “I want to kiss you.”
I blinked. “Okay.”
Now both of his eyebrows sailed upwards into his hairline. “Okay? Just like that?”
I rolled my eyes. “It’s not like we’ve never kissed before, and if I remember correctly back then I was the one who asked you.”
“We were ten.”
I was kind of insulted by the subtle disparaging tone in his voice. Sure, the kiss wasn’t fireworks and magic, but it was soft and it was sweet and heck, it was my first kiss. It was my only kiss. And we laughed ourselves silly afterwards. “So?”
I scowled when he looked at me as if I was missing something very important. “What?”
He smiled and the smile grew into a grin that evolved into a chuckle. I was tempted to follow through with the urge to whap him over the head when he suddenly pulled on my hands and kissed me.
When he angled his head and his hand covered my nape, I understood why he had laughed at me. Obviously, Gabe had learned some major new tricks over the space of seven years.
The fingers on my nape slipped into my hair while his other hand ran up my spine and curved over my shoulder, pressing me closer to him.
All the while his mouth stayed on mine.
His lips were cool and slightly dry, but they warmed and softened over mine as seconds crept by, and I noticed there were certain advantages to kissing a boy who was only slightly taller than me.
Then Gabe shifted slightly and opened his mouth against mine. My heart stuttered and decided to pump faster and harder inside my chest, beating a rapid thudthudthud against my ribs. We certainly didn’t kiss like this when we were ten. I kept my fingers on the curtains, crushing the soft, thick material with my fingers as the harmless kiss grew sharp edges by the second. His lips moved slowly but firmly over mine, and their gentle pressure coaxed my lips open, just a little, and I heard a low muffled sound from Gabe which I took for approval.
At least, I hoped it was approval.
Belatedly, as Gabe’s fingers held onto me tighter and his lips moved even surer against mine, I realized what was happening. The repercussions of what we were doing dropped on me like an Acme anvil. But it still took several seconds for me to touch my hands to Gabe’s chest—which of course he took as encouragement rather than a lame attempt to stop him.
My thoughts scattered when Gabe stroked a thumb over my cheekbone and softly, gently ran the tip of his tongue against my bottom lip.
Shivers streaked up my spine and my knees locked into place but I managed to tear my mouth from his and gasp out, “Gabe, stop.”
I was torn between admiration and insult when Gabe immediately did just that. His hands dropped to his sides while he took a step back. His eyes—usually mild and humorous, but now wearing a darker, predatory gleam—stayed on mine. When those familiar eyes with the unfamiliar light dropped to my swollen lips, I almost closed the window on his face.
But he looked away, breathing in air with big gulps, until after taking one long breath he finally looked back at me.
His expression was almost back to normal, but I could see the slight tightness around his eyes, the way he pressed his lips together, which only made mine buzz even stronger.
“So,” I said when we only managed to stare at each other. I tried a smile. “How did I mark in this experiment of yours?”
I knew it was the wrong thing to say when he went still. No one grew still like Gabe could, even our karate sensei commented on it. It was the stillness of animals, of hunters, of soldiers. The stillness lasted two seconds, four, before his stance relaxed. His grin was wide and all kinds of wrong, and I squelched the guilt that pricked at my heart.
“Not bad.” He said, his eyes glittering in the soft light of my night-light. “You need a little more practice, though.”
It was a sign. I figured surely there couldn’t be a more obvious opening line than that. I plastered a small smile on my face and went in for the kill. “Maybe I’ll get a little more practice while you’re away. Summer love and all that.”
Something passed over Gabe’s face, like a passing cloud over the path of the moon in a midnight sky. His eyes locked onto my face, and I had to fight to keep a smile there. But I managed, because this was important. At that exact second, nothing was more important than this. I couldn’t lose Gabe, and as clichéd as it was, getting involved with Gabe in that way would only muck things up, and I really didn’t know how to survive without Gabe as my best friend.
Lying to him when he was my best friend was bad enough.
What if I ended up like my mother, disappearing into thin air?
It would kill my family and Gabe would—
I didn’t want to think of how Gabe would react. It hurt too much and the possibilities were too many. So, with that in mind, when Gabe reached out a hand to hold mine, I softly pulled away, and saw the light inside his eyes dimmed.
“Bye, Gabe. Be careful, all right?”
Gabe’s eyes watched me for a full minute before he stuck his hands inside his pockets and nodded. “Okay, you too.”
His eyes strayed to mine before he pivoted, jogged, and vaulted over the fence that parted our houses.
When he turned as if to look at me, I pulled away from the window and closed it tight.
I made harmless doodles on my notes as I remembered, absently listening to Mrs. Delilah’s rambling. Those months while he was away had been a practice in self-reliance, self-control, and sheer denial; but I decided that maybe it was exactly what we needed.
Besides, Gabe could snap his fingers and girls would line three deep in front of him, anxious for his attention. So I was pretty sure he’d get over his…curiosity soon enough, and from the way he had sidled up to me this morning like he had done every previous day of our lives, I figured he already had.
I ignored the twinge in my heart and sighed softly, relieved to have managed to avoid such a crisis that could have gone all levels of wrong. But now that Gabriel was back and it seemed we had returned to our usual status quo, everything in my life was as it should be.
I could almost forget the feeling of gloom that I had felt when I woke up this morning.
False alarm, I convinced myself. Sure, they were hanging out in the school in larger numbers than usual but that wasn’t so odd. All I needed to focus on was to get good grades, do my chores, and concentrate on ignoring everything else that didn’t involve those two things. If I did that and kept my head low, what could possibly go wrong?
My stomach plummeted as those words echoed inside my head and the fine hairs on the back of my neck rose straight up at attention.
No. No way.
I kept my head down but inched my eyes toward the front of the class where Mrs. Delilah had paused in the middle of a sentence because someone had knocked on the door.
Impossible.
I watched as Mrs. Delilah greeted the tall, lanky stranger, and tried to ignore the hum of interest from my classmates.
“He’s new. I met him in the teachers’ lounge,” Juliet whispered, but I was busy hunching over my seat, trying to make myself invisible as best as I could.
Mrs. Delilah clapped her hands and waved in the new student, her face wreathed with one of her rare smiles. “Class, we have a new student. His name is Justin Real and I’m sure we’ll do everything we can to help him settle down.”
I sliced a glance toward my classmates’ faces and watched them smile at ‘Justin Real’, looking at him like he was some kind of god. But that was how it had always been when normal people met one of them. They couldn’t help but gravitate toward them, be influenced by them. After all, that was why they were made.
To be influenced. To be persuaded. To be prepared.
I watched my classmates, including David Wile—the class bully—make way for him as he walked with long, wide steps to his chair—which was on the other side of the class.
Thank God for small mercies.
The answer to my unvoiced question, what could possibly be wrong?
Apparently everything.
Because Justin Real, the new student, was Touched.
I could deal with people who were Touched, but Justin Real wasn’t just Touched. My eyes slid a couple of inches from Justin to the shiny, shimmering profile which stood silently behind him, unseen by normal eyes.
He was also sporting a rare, one-of-a-kind accessory. Justine Real had, for lack of a better word, a Guardian Angel backing him up on his first day of school.
Talk about overkill.
And just when it seemed things couldn’t get any worse, the shiny, shimmering profile turned, as if it sensed me or my thoughts, and although I couldn’t see its face, I knew it was looking at me.
I tore my eyes away from it and stared down at my desk. Sweat dribbled down the middle of my back to pool at the waistband of my skirt. Sunrise burst inside my mouth and sounds, eerie and rapturous, erupted inside my head. My skin felt as if it was trying to crawl away from my body, and the room was simply too hot. Suddenly faced with everything that I had tried to avoid my whole life, I did what any normal seventeen year old would do; I went up to the teacher and feigned some sort of vague illness. And this time I didn’t have to lie very much. I already felt and looked the part.
Copyright © 2012 by D.F. Jules
